The Inspirational Office Poster to End Inspirational Office Posters

Thanks to my friend Jamie for this photo.

Q: My new guy has facial hair and I hate it! A: Suck it up.

Dear Go-To Girl,
I met this new guy and he's got facial hair, which I kind of hate both aesthetically and in terms of making out. What to do?

Likes it shaved,

Jenny

Dear Jenny,

I totally sympathize with you on this one. I can't stand facial hair. In my case, I'm fairly confident there's some Oedipal cause--I've never seen my father's face as it's been covered by a full beard since he was about 24.

That said, I think ladies have about as much authority to demand a facial-shave as guys do a lady-shave. (Which is to say none, guys) But since you get to see a guy's face before a guy gets to see your parts (most of the time, anyway), if you really don't like facial hair, you wouldn't have been attracted to this guy in the first place. So maybe you're not as grossed out by facial hair as you think you are.

Me, I like a guy who hasn't shaved for, like, 5 days. The hair isn't mean and scratchy to Go-To Girl's soft, delicate skin at that point, but they don't look all bearded and caveman-ish.

So, to answer your question, here's what you should do: make out with him with hair. If you really can't stand the way it feels against your skin, ask him to shave. But he might say no.

Love,
GTG

PS-Guys, a goatee is never acceptable. Y'all should rise up against the douchebag that has tricked men into thinking that this is not only an acceptable but an attractive way to cover one's face. Yuck.

More Circumcision Nonsense

File this one under "What About the Fucking?"

From BBC News:
Circumcision Does Not Curb Sex

Besides the hilarious and awkward translation of "curb" from British English to American English, this article is about the leaders of the Ugandan circumcision-as-HIV-prevention-method study (who are people I know, by the way) attempting to assuage fears that circumcision, even if it is an effective HIV prevention method, will significantly effect sexual experiences of adult (!) men who undergo the procedure.

"Our study clearly shows that being circumcised did not have an adverse effect on the men who underwent the procedure when we compared them with the men who had not yet received surgery," said Professor Ronald Gray, who led the study.

One thing to remember here, though: the head of the uncircumcised penis is super sensitive because it is covered by foreskin almost all of the time. The loss of sensation due to removal of the foreskin would increase over time as the nerve endings are more and more exposed to fabric of clothes, the elements, whatever. So they should really ask them a few years out about sexual pleasure changes--most males who undergo circumcision as infants have about 15 years to dull the head of the penis before they use it for sex.

Some 98.4% of the circumcised men reported satisfaction, compared to 99.9% in the control group.

In terms of ability to penetrate, 98.6% of the circumcised group reported no problem, compared with 99.4 of the non-circumcised group.

However marginally more circumcised men - 99.4% - reported that they had no pain during intercourse, compared with 98.8% of the other group.

Again--the above questions are about overall pleasure; none of them specifically ask if they experience more or less sensation in the penis, which is the risk you face with circumcision. As much as I respect these scholars and trust their judgment, when it comes to actually talking to people about the sex that they're actually having, doctors usually miss the mark. Sigh.

Important disclaimer for Amurrica: Circumcision is not an effective HIV prevention method in developed country contexts (i.e., the U.S. and Europe). Don't go thinking that if you're circumcised you're not at risk for HIV and if you're uncut, don't go getting circumcised. Please.

Log Cabin Republicans, Take Note: The Initiation of Gay Men

University of Michigan Professor David Halperin. Don't look too close--he might make you gay!

Thanks to Kels for this tip:

The University of Michigan is offering a course this spring called "How to be Gay: Male Homosexuality and Initiation."

Promising to be both an examination of and an introduction to the initiation process itself, the course:

In particular, we will examine a number of cultural artifacts and activities that seem to play a prominent role in learning how to be gay: Hollywood movies, grand opera, Broadway musicals, and other works of classical and popular music, as well as camp, diva-worship, drag, muscle culture, taste, style, and political activism.

The instructor, David Halperin, has been subject to lots of criticism and even proposed legislation in Michigan to end his course by way of forcing the state to "scrutinize" funding for public universities. This article, from the University of Michigan Michigan Daily talks about the controversy.

Obviously, you can't teach someone how to be gay. But you can teach them to participate in gay life effectively. Log Cabin Republicans, take note. Perhaps Halperin could be the keynote speaker at your annual convention.

Victoriana Alert: HPV Vaccine Causes Fainting!

I'm not making this up. From the Associated Press:

The groundbreaking vaccine that prevents cervical cancer in girls is gaining a reputation as the most painful of childhood shots, health experts say. As Austin Powers would say; "Ouch, baby. Very ouch."

And there's more:

During its first year of use, reports of girls fainting from vaccinations climbed, but it's not clear whether the pain of the cervical cancer vaccine was the reason for the reaction.

Doctors suggest the fainting may be due to "the needles," or -- wait for it -- "nervousness."

Fainting? Nervousness? Next thing we know women who get the Gardasil vaccine will be suffering from hysteria and nymphomania. Call the whambulance.