Wednesday, September 30, 2009

The Women Who Want You to Keep It In Your Pants Calendar (by force, if necessary)

Can't wait for the calendar? Get the poster for $8!

OMG. Via Perez Hilton (thanks, K!). The Clare Boothe Luce Policy Institute, which is famous for putting out such purity-pushing garbage as Sense and Sexuality is getting ready to release their 5th Conservative Women of the Year Calendar.

Want to have Ann Coulter looking down at you while you look at porn on your work computer? Or that woman from the beauty pageant making you feel really, really bad while you fantasize about her during sex with your girlfriend? You're in luck.

The CBLPI is interested in making women not have sex, and they use the same "But nobody ever told me!" bullshit line as Pam Stenzel and other abstinence pushers. The hilarious thing is that they're right--nobody ever told them how to effectively prevent STIs--because the abstinence pushers were so busy telling them "Just wait til marriage girls, and everything will be awesome. And PS the sex will be great."

The thing that nobody apparently is telling anyone: that you should never have sex. Ever. So buy the calendar and you can have a different conservative scold giving you dirty looks each month reminding you
"Keep it in the pen in 2010."

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Review: Tristan Taormino's "Rough Sex

Since 2000’s “Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Women” Tristan Taormino has distinguished herself as a bad-ass, feminist director showing women that porn can be hot. Her award winning titles, including “House of Ass” and the “Chemistry” series, portray hot actors having sex the way they want it with people they want to have sex with.

Her newest foray into smut, “Rough Sex,” breaks from her tradition of making movies that don’t include some of the more degrading features of typical gonzo porn: spitting, slapping, verbal insults, and other stuff that just isn’t hot to most women.

Rough Sex” is all about those degrading elements of porn and how, for some women, they can be turn-ons.

The film has 5 scenes, and the first two are less “rough sex” than “rape fantasy.” If aggressive, nonconsensual sex your fantasy, then these scenes will definitely turn your crank but, if not, please don’t watch.

The last 3 scenes are much more fun and hot. In the first, Francesca is a neglected housewife who tops her powerful executive husband, Christian, with a scene that ends with her adorably yelling “I’m in charge and I want you to make me come!” And how.

“Caught,” featuring the gorgeous and talented “Chemistry” veteran Marie, portrays angry couple sex with some amazing camera work in front of a large mirrored closet.

The headline scene features crossover it-girl Sasha Grey and Danny, who looks like an indie rocker straight out of Austin. The scene is combative and rough, but definitely sexy.

Fans of Tristan’s work, which always features interviews with cast members so they can vocalize their desires and make it clear to (women) viewers that they are in porn by choice, would be well advised to avoid the first two scenes on this disc if they have any rape triggers. But the last 3 scenes are hot and worth watching.

Friday, September 25, 2009

Nip Stim How-To

the Nipplettes Vibrating Clamps from Babeland

Dear GTG,

So I've found that nipple stimulation helps me achieve orgasm, especially when it's someone else (someone less familiar than me) on my clitoris. I've been thinking it might be fun to experiment with something other than my own fingers on said nipples; I've experimented a bit with twisting and pulling, but not too-too hard. Having heard tell of nipple clamps, I did some googling, and I may get a set of adjustables to play with. However, google failed me when I searched for "alternatives to nipple clamps" and I'm figuring that's because I don't know what to search for. As someone with a greater knowledge of sex toys than I, I'm hoping you'll have some suggestions :)


Dear MaryAnn,

Lots of women are into heavy nipple stimulation. There are lots of nerve endings on the nipples and, with the right amount of warm-up, most nipples can take a lot of twisting, pulling, pinching, and biting. (Hello, breastfeeding?)

For those women who crave nipple stimulation at times when everybody's hands and mouths are otherwise occupied, nipple clamps are a great idea. Most are connected with a chain or string, so you can use one hand to pull and tease both nipples at the same time.

I assume that in your search for nipple clamps you discovered the adjsutable Crocodile Clamps, which are connected with a chain and screw onto nipples for adjustable play. The thing about anything that's adjustable, though, is that you have to adjust it. The Clover Clamps aren't adjustable and probably take some getting used to because they look tight.

If painful stimulation isn't really what you're after, the Nipplettes Vibrating Clamps might be just the thing. They're pink (win!), adjustable, and they're made out of rubber and not metal for a gentler feeling on your nips. The clips don't come with a chain but any piece of hot pink satin ribbon would do just fine.

I'm not sure what "alternatives" there are, unless you mean stuff you don't have to buy from a sex toy store. I assume old fashioned clothespins work just fine for some people, but they're kind of big and bulky for wearing during sex. I Googled "homemade nipple clamps" and, besides clothespins, G Clamps came up as a cheap, hardware store option.

Hope that helps!


Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Newest Texas Anti-Abortion Ad Ruins Season Premiere of "CSI: Miami"

A typical Majella Society Billboard in Austin (photo credit)

If you live in Austin, Texas you may have noticed the "Pregnant? Scared?" billboards around town. Actually, if you live in Anywhere, USA you may have noticed these billboards around town: they're boilerplate ads for organizations affiliated with OptionLine, a national anti-abortion "pregnancy crisis" hotline.

Here in Austin, the local affiliate is the Majella Society, which literally provides no services other than billboards and, shockingly, PSAs during primetime television encouraging young women to call the hotline for help. You can even text "pregnant" to them if you don't want to have them tell you you're a slut for having premarital sex on the phone.

Imagine my surprise when, during last night's season premiere of "CSI: Miami" I saw the above commercial. Apparently, these ads are effective by Majella's measures. The below stats are from the page featuring links to all of their ads.

Consider these results:
*Made 149,713,54 impressions among Texans
*Reached target market of women between 18 and 49 an average of 21 times
*Professional polling data confirms that the Austin area population, moved 5 points in a consistent life-affirming point of view, from 27 percent to 32 percent
In 2008 in Texas we--
*Received more than 18,000 calls to OptionLine
*Reached 136,800+ Texas teens through our Web site

Their website reveals a host of interesting information, including that their fundraising dinners this fall will feature Mike Huckabee and Kathy Ireland--and that they're expanding to Chicago. But one thing their website doesn't deliver? Financials. The page is "under construction." But if they've got enough cash to run an ad during the season premiere of America's most awesome television show, their "financials" must be pretty interesting...

Monday, September 21, 2009

Annals of Obvious:
Religiosity causes pregnancy

Baby Daddy Levi "We were practicing safe sex [except for that one time]" and Bristol.

Via Feministing, more research has come out demonstrating that states with higher proportions of religious people have higher rates of teen birth. Yes, duh. This was the thesis of last year's New Yorker article Red Sex, Blue Sex. It makes perfect sense that states with more people who are anti-contraception and anti-abortion would see higher teen pregnancy, because teen sex is not preventable.

Humans are designed to have sex as teenagers. The idea that we could possibly eliminate teen sex is completely laughable hubris. Vows of celibacy, pledges of abstinence, rings of purity: all of them are violins on the Titanic of teenage virginity. It's going down, people. I promise you.

When you take teenagers who are designed by God (or whoever) to have babies (which, usually, result from sex) and remove contraception and access to abortion, you are going to have higher prengancy (because you've eliminated birth control) and birth (because you've eliminated abortion) rates. Stop being surprised. If I am credited with anything for my work, I hope it is my foundational theory of sex education:

Sexual behavior at the population level does not change significantly over time.

Quote me on that.

Monday, September 14, 2009

FDA Approves Gardasil for Boys:
HPV Terror Threat Level About to Go Up!

Merck's new dude-targeted Gardasil ad?

We knew it would happen eventually: the FDA has approved the marketing of Gardasil, Merck's wildly expensive and probably effective HPV vaccine, to boys. Since boys don't have cervixes (at least, not yet) the vaccine will only be marketed for the prevention of genital warts. Here's a choice quote from the Times article on the decision:

Although the F.D.A. panelists voted that Merck had demonstrated the safety and efficacy of Gardasil for boys, skepticism among a few panelists suggested that Merck may find it difficult to persuade boys to have shots for an uncomfortable but non-life-threatening problem that often resolves itself without medical intervention.

I, for one, can't wait for the faux-social marketing ad campaigns that are going to come out of this. The prevention of cervical cancer death, a relatively nonimportant health issue in the United States, was an effective hook because people are still scared of--and confused by--cancer, especially cancer of the lady parts that is caused by exposure to gentleman parts.

Men can get penis or anal cancer from HPV, but Gardasil has not been shown effective at preventing the strains that cause these cancers so it can only be marketed for its wart-preventing effects.

Apparently everybody's already forgotten last summer's expose in the Times that revealed how hard Merck lobbied (they would say "educated") physicians, nurses, and policymakers to manufacture demand for Gardasil:
Said Dr. Raffle, the British cervical cancer specialist [of the possibility of approval for boys]: “Oh, dear. If we give it to boys, then all pretense of scientific worth and cost analysis goes out the window.”

Wednesday, September 02, 2009

Time out over: Welcome back, IWF!

After former president Nancy "Real Virginia" Pfotenhauer left the Independent Women's Forum (as in, "women are independently able to subject themselves to the patriarchy") they seemed pretty aimless and haven't had much to say beyond "Rah Rah Iraq War" over the last year or so.
But they're back! Never satisfied to continue to pretend they're just supporting women's right to choose not to have an abortion, that school choice is good, that boys are being discriminated against, and that staying at home with kids is a "choice" that women should have the "right" to make without being "discriminated against" by those nasty professional women who choose to go to work every day, they've entered the completely insane anti-health reform fray with a new video you can only view on the IWF website.

Thank goodness Glenn Beck is taking them seriously. At least, seriously enough to refer to them as the Women's Independence Forum. Glad to know even the right wing idiots who, I assume, IWF is actually talking to give a shit about them.