Q: More orgasms during sex? A: Have more by yourself.

Dear Go-To Girl,

Some of the girls at here at our sweet Quaker college got into a long conversation about sex and habits, relationships, etc. I brought up your website, which got us talking a bit more. Your 10-10-50 rule got mixed reviews, but we went through to find more explanations and was then agreed upon. But what came up was the fact that 4 our of the 5 girls participating in the conversation had never had an orgasm during intercourse. Many expressed distress for not being able to "have as much fun" as their partner.

So the question for you becomes, how do we work on having an orgasm during intercourse? Are there things we can do?

Love,
Ashley

Dear Ashley,

That font of knowledge on all things college-sex-related, Cosmopolitan, has an article on this very subject in the very March issue. I haven't read it yet, so I can't tell you what it says, but I'm sure you'll recognize it by the headline, "127 Things You Do To Make Sex With Your Man More O-Tastic!!!"

But seriously. I did read the article, and here's what it said:

Tease Yourself Before He Gets There (get a little bullet vibrator)

Use Hot-Spot-Hitting Positions (they say woman on top is best; try putting your legs up over their shoulders)

Double Your Pleasure (make them touch you somewhere relevant during sex)

Turbocharge Your Touches (use lube, a vibrator, handcuffs, etc.)

The article also mentions a few things that can stand in the way of good orgasms and I want to highlight them:

Birth control pills (seriously, ladies, BCPs can have serious effects on desire and orgasm)

Antidepressants (ditto)

Alcohol (might make you want to fuck more, but it does a number on blood flow and makes you less sensitive)

My best advice to having more orgasms during sex more often is to have as many as you can when you're alone. It's not like the guys aren't constantly practicing.

Love,
Go-To Girl