Monday, December 10, 2007

Q: I bought "The Cone." I hate it. A: You're SOL.


Dear Go-To Girl,
I made a huge mistake. After my recent breakup, I desperately needed a new sex toy and I bought one without consulting you first. I got "The Cone." I hate it. What should I do?
Love,
Confused by the Cone

Dear CC,

I, too, am confused by The Cone. Every time I went to visit my friend who works at Babeland I would put my hands around it and wonder why anyone would spend $130 on a vibrating cone. There are a lot of vibrator shapes out there that manage to be both weird and orgasm-inducing, but a cone-shape isn't one I think of when I think of product success.
Since you can't return sex toys, I did some research into The Cone and here are my suggestions, which are based on the user comments at the Babeland site:


You have to sit on it.
Try out all the different vibrating options.
Use a second vibe for your clit. (I know, paying $130 for something that can't stand alone is infuriating)


If all else fails, clean it thoroughly and try to pawn it off on someone else.

Love,
GTG

2 comments:

Seth said...

It's nice to know that my lack of a vagina is not the reason I find that toy inexplicable and improbable.

par said...

Seth, you don't need a vagina to enjoy The Cone. I am enjoying four of them at once RIGHT NOW. True story.