Tuesday, June 24, 2008
My advice to those who come to me with questions about their relationships is, perhaps too often, "Break up!" Whether the question is, "Is having a threesome with my boyfriend a good way to put the spark back into our sex life? (by the way, we're 20)*" or "My boyfriend, who I want to marry, hates performing oral sex on me. Is that bad?" I usually draw a line in the sand and say, "Dump the motherfucker already!" (Thanks, Dan)
As a documented fan of He's Just Not That Into You, I eagerly read It's Called A Breakup Cause It's Broken, looking forward to more of author Greg Behrendt's harsh, "this is what the guys never tell you" wit.
Just like HJNTIY, ICABCIB is pure gold for the first 80 pages or so. He and wife Amiira write about the different stages of breakups in a way I've not seen before. There's the obvious "He told me he wants to break up" scenarios and then the less obvious "He hasn't told you yet, but he's being an asshole so you'll break up with him, and that means he's broken up with you."
They include "Psycho Confessional" and Q & A from readers that, sadly, most readers would identify with.
The second half of the book is about how to do a "Breakover" and make yourself into the "SuperFox" you really are. I couldn't be bothered to read that part, so I can't tell you how it ends. But the beginning is harsh advice that, just like HJNTIY, everyone--male or female, straight, gay, or queer--should read.
And, for the love of G-d, DTMFA!
*For the record, if you're 20 and you find yourself in need of a "spark" in your relationship, DTMFA!!! At your age, it should be all spark, no relationship.